Refining

I've been chipping away recently, particularly at my accumulated material possessions. It's been getting easier to let go the more I do it. As of late, sometimes I feel myself feeling unattached to things before I'm even completely comfortable with loosing my attachment to them. The biggest example being my pony collection--I still think the G1s are super cute, it's just I hardly even notice that the ones I still have out are there any more. Part of me wants to just keep babies Moondancer and Glory (because they're the cutest <3) and sell the rest (including my first several that I got when the obsession was new, which I was super attached to because for awhile they were the only ones I had.) Even when I think I'm done, I find I'm not--just a week or two ago I dropped a couple grocery bags of stuff of at the local thrift store and I've still got another two or so bags worth of stuff part of me has let go of (which, as mentioned before, the overly-cautious part of me is still hesitating to accept.)

Part of this is a practicality, or even a necessity. I have very little income since my classes are my top priority right now (and after that comes fun domestic stuff like cooking and sewing.) So if I want to do things that cost money, I have to sell stuff, which seems totally reasonable to me. If anything, I'm pleased that I had the taste I did when I was a teenager because the stuff I accumulated and enjoyed then more than I do now is stuff that other people still actually want. Some of the Christmas presents I got so excited about when I first got them have turned out to be two gifts in one because of this. Furthermore, when I move out I will very likely not have room for a lot of the stuff I have now, let alone all the stuff I've gotten rid of so far.

I've been chipping away at my wardrobe, too. As I start to get a taste of some of the styles I used to lust after, I realize it seems to take a lot less to satisfy myself than what I expected. I'm refining it down to just my favorite pieces, and it feels great.

It's not just material things that I'm chipping away at, though. I've been working on unlearning the cultural bullshit I absorbed as a child just by being born into this monstrous society and trying to figure how best to react to the world around me. Not that I don't have tons more unlearning and learning to do, but I feel like I understand my surroundings better than I did even a few years ago. I'm refining my priorities, and the material purging is part of that. Here's hoping I won't get so bogged down again (although I'm sure I will, given how much life I expect I have left to live.)