Berlin, you little thief.

It happened near Potsdamer Platz. Not that I especially like or dislike Potsdamer Platz, but it was during the first couple days of the Berlinale, and the atmosphere must have gotten to me. Berlin stole a chunk of my heart. Not a big one, but enough so I noticed. It wasn't as big a deal then--I still had plenty of time left.

Now it's April and I've got less than four months. Still plenty of time, but my stay in Berlin is nonetheless more than half over. The reality that I will be going back to the United States--possibly never to return--is becoming more and more solid. Even if that's practically a whole semester, I don't think it'll be enough time to find the missing chunk of heart.

And even if I did, I don't think I'd want it back. It wouldn't fit right. This city will have probably tossed it around and sucked on it and played with it and so on. The damage is permanent, so I guess the amount of time I have left here doesn't matter all that much.

Now that I think of it, I think London must've nicked a tiny piece, too. I was there for a little less than a week, and I already miss it. Sometimes I feel like going somewhere in that area and get all excited, then a second later I remember, "oh, wait, you'd need to take a twelve-hour night train to Paris and then another two-hour ride to London and it would be ridiculously expensive if it's only for one day." I've been in Berlin for over six months already, and once I've left it'll take a multi-legged/hundreds-of-dollars plane trip to return. I can scarcely imagine how it'll feel when I start thinking, "oh, I should go to the Mauer Park flea market this weekend" and I'm in Minneapolis. Or when I decide I want macarons and bubble tea, then remember that the Tea Garden doesn't have macarons (which reminds me I should really start working on my not-yet-existant hoarde of Leone pastilles. May as well put off missing those as long as I can XD.)

Much as I love Berlin, I'm also not looking foward to the simple fact of re-adjusting to new surroundings. I've become quite used to my current location, and even developed a reflexive tendency to refer to my dorm as "home". The more open schedule that comes with my current classes and living within walking distance (or at least convenient bus-riding distance) from my university certainly don't hurt, either.

Not that going back home won't be nice, though. After all, the knowledge that I will be going back is what gets me through missing my family and friends back home. It's just that I won't have that knowledge to get me through missing Berlin. Here's hoping that my love of Minneapolis and all that comes with it will be enough.